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Hair Trauma Is A Real Thing | Natural Curly Hair Damage

Why I think hair trauma is a real thing.....

Many curlies will often tell you a story of a time that their hair was deemed unmanageable, too much, too thick, unprofessional, not elegant enough, the list goes on..... All of these things add up to create an image of someone who does not fit within a box society created.

I remember a time when I went to the hair dressers when I was a child and I had a massive knot in my hair, they simply cut my hair off above my ears. Now many years later I still remember that. I am sure many of us have hairdresser horror stories, from the relaxer burning your head, to the pulling when detangle (this was a nightmare), hair not being straight enough, long enough, not having certain curl pattern..... 

I created an opinion from a young age that I did not like my natural hair but I also ended up not like my straight hair as either style never felt 'good enough'. I often found myself comparing my hair to others, why is curl pattern this way or why is their hair perfectly straight and mine isn't, why doesn't my hair grow longer like them. Other people often shared their views to asking why my hair was this type of curl and not that type of curl, saying statements like 'your hair looks like it has had an electric shock'. All these things do not create a positive mindset surrounding natural hair.

In 2012 I decided to go natural after watching different YouTube video's and seeing how beautiful their curly hair was, and thinking that if they could do it so could I. This is my hair at the beginning of my transitioning stage and after my transitioning stage:

How Did I Overcome Hair Trauma

I began to love my hair while going through my transitioning process from straight to curly hair, was through my self acceptance. Of course their are many people who relax and straighten their hair, love their hair and have great self acceptance, and if your one of those you rock it, but I am referring to those who maybe struggling with this.

Self acceptance of your natural hair can come in many different ways:

  • Loving the different curl patterns
  • Loving your curl pattern and someone else's equally not more or less
  • Removing negative comparisons- your hair is just as beautiful as their hair
  • Positive self talk
  • Understanding your hair, trial and error- finding what works for you.

The thing I am loving more and more is that more naturals are speaking up about these things creating awareness, making others feeling like they are not alone. Although, this doesn't remove the trauma it creates a community of people to share curly hair love, tips and knowledge to how to 'care' for your curly hair. The reason why I say 'care' is because often people will say 'manage' but our hair doesn't need managing its not unmanageable, it needs time and care like any great thing.

While growing up it was always a difficulty to find natural hair care in prominent high street shops and there wasn't a wealth of knowledge available which I could locate to learn how to care for curly hair. My curly journey and experiences are one of the reasons I created Ashanti Curls to bring tips, accessories and curly love to those who are thinking of going natural or are natural already. 

So wear your crown of curls with pride. Of course this is not always an easily process, it takes time and it is normal to go backwards and forwards when growing in confidence regarding your natural hair but once achieved it is a beautiful thing. Keep going, you've got this !

If you struggling with hair trauma why not watch some YouTube videos for inspiration, speak about your feelings with others... share stories.... we would love to hear your stories and what helped you overcome your hair trauma. If you want to share your story on our blog email us at

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